15 Questions To Ask Yourself If You Want To Avoid Marrying The Wrong Person

Choosing the right person to marry is one of the most important decisions you’ll ever make. 

It’s not something to rush into or take lightly. Marrying the wrong person can lead to heartache and regret, so it’s worth taking the time to really think about what you want and need in a partner.

Before making a lifelong commitment, it’s smart to pause and reflect. Relationships are complex, and while love is important, it isn’t always enough to keep a marriage strong. 

Other factors play a big role in making sure you’re with the right person.

In this article, we’ll explore 15 key questions that can help you figure out if the person you’re with is truly the right one for you.

1. Do I Feel Truly Comfortable Being Myself Around Them?

You might wonder, “Can I truly be myself with this person?” This question gets to the heart of compatibility. 

Being in a relationship should feel like you’re accepted for who you are, flaws and all. No one should have to pretend to be someone else to keep the peace or make the other person happy. 

If you find yourself holding back parts of your personality, or if you feel the need to walk on eggshells, it’s worth thinking twice. 

Feeling genuinely comfortable means you can laugh, cry, and be honest without fear of judgment or rejection.

A solid relationship is one where both people feel free to express themselves openly. 

Comfort isn’t just about sharing the good moments; it’s also about being able to communicate your fears, insecurities, and dreams. 

If there’s a constant worry about being judged or misunderstood, it’s a sign that something might be off. 

Your partner should be someone who encourages you to be your best self, not someone who makes you feel small or inadequate.

2. Do We Share The Same Core Values?

Sharing core values is essential for long-term compatibility. 

Think about the things that matter most to you—things like honesty, family, career goals, or religious beliefs. 

These are the building blocks of your life, and they should align with your partner’s. 

When two people have vastly different values, it can lead to serious conflicts down the road. 

For example, if one person values financial stability and the other is more carefree with money, that can create tension.

It’s not just about agreeing on everything, but understanding and respecting each other’s viewpoints. 

Sometimes, small differences can be worked out, but significant value clashes can become major roadblocks. 

Take time to have deep conversations about what’s important to each of you. This will help you see if your life paths are truly compatible or if you’re headed in different directions.

3. Can We Handle Disagreements In A Healthy Way?

Every couple disagrees at some point, but how those disagreements are handled can make or break a relationship. 

Reflect on how you and your partner argue. Do these discussions end with a mutual understanding, or do they spiral into yelling matches or silent treatments? 

The ability to communicate respectfully during disagreements is crucial. Couples who can’t resolve conflicts often end up resenting each other, which can weaken the relationship over time.

A healthy relationship doesn’t mean never fighting; it means knowing how to fight fair. Are you both able to listen to each other and compromise when needed? 

Conflict resolution should bring you closer, not drive you apart. If conflicts are tearing you down instead of building you up, it’s a sign to reconsider if this person is right for you.

4. Do We Have Similar Life Goals?

Think about where you see yourself in five, ten, or twenty years. Now, consider whether your partner sees themselves in a similar place. 

Having aligned life goals is key to a successful marriage. Maybe you want to travel the world while they want to settle down in one place. 

Or perhaps you’re focused on advancing your career while they prioritize starting a family right away. These are important conversations to have early on.

Differences in life goals don’t always have to be deal-breakers, but they need to be discussed openly. 

Compromise is possible, but both people must be on the same page about what they’re willing to give and take. 

Make sure your dreams are not only compatible but also that you both support each other in achieving them.

[Interesting: The Kind Of Woman Any Man Would Want To Marry]

5. Am I Attracted To Them Beyond The Physical?

Physical attraction is often the first thing that draws people together, but it’s not enough to sustain a long-term relationship. 

Think about what attracts you to your partner beyond their looks. Are you attracted to their kindness, intelligence, sense of humor, or the way they treat others? 

These qualities are what will matter in the long run, especially as physical appearances change over time.

A deep, lasting attraction goes beyond just the surface. It’s about admiring who the person is at their core. 

If the relationship is primarily based on physical attraction, it might not withstand the test of time. 

Make sure you’re with someone you truly respect and admire, someone whose character you find just as appealing as their appearance.

6. Do I Feel Respected And Valued In This Relationship?

Feeling respected and valued is non-negotiable in a healthy relationship. Ask yourself if your partner treats you with the dignity you deserve. 

Do they listen to your opinions, support your ambitions, and respect your boundaries? A relationship where you feel belittled or taken for granted can lead to long-term dissatisfaction and hurt.

Mutual respect forms the foundation of any strong relationship. It’s important that both partners feel their contributions are recognized and appreciated. 

When respect is present, it fosters trust, love, and a deep connection. Without it, the relationship may start to feel one-sided and emotionally draining. 

Prioritize your well-being and ensure you’re with someone who genuinely values who you are.

[Also Read: The Percentage Of Marriages That Last 30 Years, According to Studies]

7. Do We Support Each Other’s Growth?

Personal growth is a lifelong journey, and your partner should be someone who encourages you to grow, not someone who holds you back. 

Consider if your partner supports your goals, dreams, and personal development. Are they excited about your successes and there for you during your challenges? 

A relationship should be a safe space where both people feel supported in becoming their best selves.

Supporting each other’s growth means celebrating each other’s achievements and being there through the struggles. 

A partner who is threatened by your success or uninterested in your growth can hinder your potential. 

Choose someone who inspires you and whom you can inspire in return. Together, you should be able to build a future where both of you can thrive individually and as a couple.

8. Can I Imagine A Future Together?

Finally, picture your future and see if your partner fits into it. Can you imagine growing old with them, facing life’s ups and downs together? 

Visualizing your future can give you a clear sense of whether this person is someone you want by your side long-term. It’s not just about the big moments, but the everyday life you’ll share.

Consider the small things, like how you’ll spend weekends or tackle daily challenges. If the thought of a future together feels right and fills you with hope, that’s a positive sign. 

But if imagining life together brings up doubts or concerns, it might be worth reassessing. 

Your future happiness depends on choosing a partner who complements your life and makes the journey worthwhile.

9. Are We Good Friends?

A strong relationship often starts with a solid friendship. Think about the foundation of your connection. 

Do you genuinely enjoy each other’s company? Can you laugh together, share secrets, and just hang out without feeling the need to impress? 

Friendship brings a level of comfort and trust that goes beyond romantic attraction.

Being good friends means you like who the other person is, not just as a partner but as a person. 

There’s a bond that comes from truly knowing each other, flaws and all, and still wanting to spend time together. Friendship in a relationship can help weather tough times and keep the connection strong.

10. Can We Talk About Anything?

Open communication is key to a successful relationship. Conversations shouldn’t just be about everyday things like work or what to have for dinner. 

It’s about feeling free to discuss deeper topics, such as your fears, hopes, and what bothers you. 

Honest communication means both of you feel heard and understood, without judgment.

Good communication builds a bridge between two people. It helps resolve misunderstandings and creates a deeper connection. 

When both partners are open and willing to talk about anything, it strengthens the relationship. 

Silence or avoiding important conversations can lead to bigger issues later on.

11. Do We Have Fun Together?

Life can get serious, but having fun together keeps the relationship lively. Think about how often you and your partner laugh or do things that bring joy. 

Fun isn’t just about going out or doing exciting things; sometimes it’s the simple moments, like joking around or watching a movie together, that matter.

Enjoying each other’s company during the good times helps create memories and strengthens your bond. Relationships shouldn’t feel like all work and no play. 

A shared sense of humor and finding joy in the little things can make a big difference in how happy and fulfilled you feel together.

12. Can I Count On Them?

Reliability is a big deal in any relationship. Ask yourself whether you can depend on your partner when it matters.

Are they there for you during tough times? Do they follow through on their promises? Knowing that your partner has your back is essential for building trust.

Being able to count on someone means you feel secure in the relationship. It’s about knowing that your partner won’t let you down when you need them most. 

Consistency in actions shows that your partner is committed and dependable, which is crucial for long-term happiness.

13. Do We Respect Each Other’s Boundaries?

Respecting boundaries is crucial in any relationship. Consider whether your partner understands and respects your personal space, time, and limits. 

Everyone needs a bit of breathing room, and healthy boundaries help maintain balance in the relationship.

Respecting each other’s boundaries shows mutual understanding and care. It’s about recognizing that both people have individual needs and preferences. 

A partner who respects your boundaries values you as an individual and doesn’t push you beyond what you’re comfortable with.

14. Are We on the Same Page About Family?

Family can play a big role in your future together, so it’s important to be on the same page. 

Whether it’s about having children, how to raise them, or how involved extended family will be, these are discussions that should happen early on. 

Being aligned on family matters helps avoid conflicts down the road.

Differences in family expectations can lead to tension if not addressed. Discussing and agreeing on these topics helps ensure that both partners share the same vision for the future. 

Family is a major part of life, and having a mutual understanding is essential for a harmonious relationship.

15. Do I Like Myself When I’m With Them?

How you feel about yourself in the relationship can say a lot. Do you feel confident, valued, and happy when you’re with your partner? 

A good relationship should bring out the best in you, making you feel more like yourself, not less.

Liking who you are with your partner is a sign of a healthy relationship. You should feel proud of the person you’re becoming together. 

A partner who uplifts you and makes you feel good about yourself is someone worth keeping around. The right relationship should enhance your life, not diminish it.