You’ve been dating someone for a while now and things seem to be going great.
And maybe you’ve even met each other’s friends. It’s exciting and fun, but also a bit nerve-wracking.
You might be thinking, “Is this it? Are we ready to take things to the next level and make this relationship official?”
Making a relationship official is a big step. It’s like declaring to the world, “Hey, we’re serious about each other.” But before you jump into it, there are a few things to think about.
Just like you wouldn’t buy a car without checking it over, or a house without inspecting it, making a relationship official needs some consideration too.
This article is going to talk about five things you should consider before you take that leap.
1. Evaluate Your Connection
Connection is about how you feel when you’re with your partner. Is it comfortable and easy or tense and confusing?
People often confuse intensity for intimacy. Genuine intimacy is about being able to share yourself honestly with your partner and having them do the same.
It’s not just about passionate nights or heated arguments.
Take your time to understand what you feel for this person. Do you genuinely enjoy their company beyond the initial physical attraction or shared hobbies?
At the end of the day, a profound connection is what will carry the relationship forward.
[Related: 10 First Date Signs He Wants A Relationship]
2. Compatibility
Compatibility is not about having the same hobbies or favorite food. It’s about aligning your fundamental values, life goals, and ways of handling challenges.
You and your partner might enjoy different activities, yet have a similar perspective on more profound aspects, like family, career, or personal growth.
Consider how you two handle disagreements. Compatibility isn’t about never arguing—it’s about how you resolve those arguments.
A healthy argument leads to a resolution, not a power struggle. Can you disagree with each other, express your feelings, yet come to a compromise?
Also, notice how you spend time together. Do you feel happy, content, and appreciated when with your partner? How does your partner influence your mood? Evaluating the quality of your shared time can shed light on your overall compatibility.
Finally, consider your future plans. Does your partner fit into those plans and vice versa? Shared aspirations and goals can strengthen the bond and provide a shared direction in your relationship.
3. Trust and Respect
Trust is based on actions more than words. It’s about showing your partner that they can rely on you through consistency in your actions. And, it goes both ways.
Trust also involves being vulnerable with each other. It’s about knowing that your partner will respect your feelings, secrets, and individuality.
This aspect of trust helps to build a safe and secure environment in a relationship.
Respect is as significant as trust. A relationship devoid of mutual respect can harbor toxicity.
Respect involves honoring each other’s boundaries, appreciating differences, and not belittling each other. It means treating each other as equals and valuing each other’s opinions.
Trust and respect in a relationship should be unconditional. It means having faith in your partner, even when they make mistakes, and showing respect even in the heat of an argument.
[Also read: 15 Signs God Is Protecting You From A Bad Relationship]
4. Independence
Even when you’re in a relationship, maintaining a level of independence is necessary. It’s about having a sense of self, separate from the relationship.
It means pursuing your interests, spending time alone, and staying connected with friends and family.
Your happiness shouldn’t solely depend on your partner. It’s healthy to find joy and fulfillment in other areas of your life.
This independence allows you to bring more to the relationship and can enhance the quality of the time you spend together.
Independence can also mean financial autonomy. In a relationship, it’s essential to have open discussions about finances. What are each partner’s expectations, and how will you manage shared expenses?
5. Emotional Readiness
Emotional readiness is about being emotionally available to accept and reciprocate love. It also means having the emotional maturity to handle the ups and downs that come with a relationship.
Be aware of any unresolved issues from your past relationships or personal life. These issues can affect your ability to fully commit to a new relationship.
It’s advisable to work through these issues before making a relationship official.
Also, recognize your emotions towards the relationship. Do you feel excited about the prospect of being together, or do you have reservations?
This self-awareness can help you determine your readiness for a committed relationship.
Emotional readiness is not a static state. It’s okay to have doubts and fears. What matters is your willingness to acknowledge these feelings and address them constructively.
[Read: The 5 Stepping Stones In a Relationship]
5 More Things To Consider Before Making A Relationship Official
1. Communication and Understanding.
Essentially, good communication in a relationship isn’t just about expressing your thoughts and feelings—it’s about facilitating an understanding between you and your partner.
When you communicate effectively, you and your partner should both feel heard, understood, and respected.
Sometimes, it’s easy to assume we know what our partner is thinking or feeling. But making assumptions can often lead to misunderstandings and hurt feelings.
Instead, aim to clarify and understand your partner’s perspective by asking open-ended questions and engaging in active listening.
Understanding also includes being aware of your partner’s feelings and reactions. You should be able to read their emotional state and respond appropriately.
This could mean offering comfort when they’re upset or giving them space when they’re frustrated.
Moreover, good communication extends beyond conversations—it’s also about being able to communicate silently.
This means being in tune with each other’s non-verbal cues, like body language, tone of voice, and facial expressions.
These can often tell you more about how someone is feeling than their words alone.
2. Shared Values
Relationships aren’t just about enjoying each other’s company or being physically attracted to each other.
They’re about shared goals, common beliefs, and synchronized life values.
You and your partner are individual entities, and it’s normal to have differences. When it comes to core values, there must be some alignment.
This means having a mutual understanding and respect for each other’s beliefs, whether it’s about religion, ethics, or lifestyle.
Also, remember that a relationship is a partnership, and like any partnership, shared goals and objectives are crucial.
Where do both of you see yourselves in the future? Are these visions compatible? Considering these points can save you a lot of misunderstandings and conflict down the road.
[Related: 10 Bases In A Relationship]
3. Conflict Resolution
Another important aspect is how you both handle disagreements. Conflicts are inevitable, but they don’t have to spell doom for your relationship.
The key lies in how you navigate through these difficult moments.
A healthy relationship is one where both parties can express their thoughts and feelings without fear of reprisal or judgment.
And when conflicts arise, they’re managed with respect, understanding, and open communication.
Evaluate how you both resolve conflicts. Do you shout and scream or withdraw and sulk? Or do you listen, understand, and seek a compromise?
Healthy conflict resolution can foster trust and build a stronger bond between you two.
4. Independence and Interdependence
One of the most beautiful things about being in a relationship is sharing your life with someone, but it’s equally important to retain your identity.
It’s essential to ensure you can still pursue your interests, spend time with friends, and maintain your personal space.
A healthy relationship isn’t about losing oneself; it’s about growing together while still nourishing individual growth.
A relationship shouldn’t restrict your life; it should enhance it. If you find yourself having to give up on your dreams, hobbies, or friends, then it’s time to step back and evaluate.
[Interesting: 10 Things Men Want In A Relationship]
5. Emotional and Physical Attraction
Physical and emotional attraction are two elements that are crucial in sparking the chemistry that draws people together. But they are only a part of the equation.
Physical attraction is often what first draws us to our partners, but it shouldn’t be the only reason we stay.
The emotional connection is what will sustain the relationship in the long run. It’s about feeling secure, respected, and loved for who you are, not just what you look like.
In summary, attraction should be a combination of both physical and emotional elements. It’s about being drawn to each other’s minds, bodies, and spirits. If one is lacking, it may lead to issues down the line.
FAQs
1. How do I know if I am ready to make my relationship official?
It’s natural to ask this question when you’re in the exciting and uncertain stage of a new relationship.
Being ready for an official relationship involves a combination of personal readiness and the quality of your relationship.
You need to feel emotionally prepared for a committed relationship, which means being able to manage both the highs and the lows that come with it.
You should also evaluate your relationship based on the factors discussed earlier—effective communication, understanding, conflict resolution, and shared experiences.
If these are positive, it could be a sign you’re ready to make things official.
You may feel ready when you can genuinely see a future with this person and when the idea of committing to them makes you feel happy and secure, rather than anxious or uncertain.
It’s important to trust your intuition and make the decision at a pace that feels comfortable for you.
2. How should we communicate about making the relationship official?
It’s important to express your feelings and intentions clearly, without pressure or expectations. Start by sharing your feelings about your relationship and why you think you’re ready to take the next step.
Allow your partner to share their feelings and thoughts as well. Both of you should be on the same page and feel comfortable with the decision.
If your partner isn’t ready yet, respect their feelings and give them time. This conversation could be the first test of your conflict resolution skills as a couple.
3. What if we aren’t compatible in all areas?
Compatibility doesn’t necessarily mean having the same preferences, habits, or opinions.
Differences can bring beneficial diversity to your relationship and encourage personal growth. What’s important is aligning on fundamental values, and being able to respect and appreciate your differences.
Even if you aren’t compatible in all areas, as long as you have mutual respect, effective communication, and can healthily resolve conflicts, your relationship can still thrive.
Always remember that perfection doesn’t exist, but a relationship that promotes growth, happiness, and mutual respect does.
- All photos from freepik.com