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A rule of thumb for dealing with women is never to take what they say they want or are attracted to at face value.

Here’s the thing: We all have ideals about the things and the kind of people we want in our lives. But the truth is, most of these things are more or less a wish list about how we will like our lives to look.

The first thoughts out of a woman’s mouth aren’t necessarily a reflection of her true thoughts or wants. Most times, humans don’t know what they want until it arrives.

If, for instance, she says, “I’ll never date a guy that’s short,” she really believes it. But this doesn’t mean it cannot change under certain conditions.

Guys who understand this about women are less attached to their words, and this gives them a better feel for reality than most men.

That said, here are seven lies most women tell men. Sometimes it’s intentional, sometimes it isn’t.

1. “I don’t care about looks”

Women say this all the time. In their quest to appear mature and substantive, you’ll often hear some of them say things like, “Looks don’t matter that much… I’m more interested in connecting with a guy.”

In 2015, interesting research was conducted involving young women between ages 15 to 29.

In the studies, the participants and their mothers (ages 37 to 61) were asked to choose a potential date from a series of photos and descriptions.

Interestingly, in both the participants and their mother’s, looks dictated the kind of guy that got picked.

Even when the profile of a man displayed good personality traits like honesty, integrity, or intelligence, it didn’t matter that much.

Indeed, most women will care about other things more than looks, — like connecting with a guy — but they always care about looks more than they’re willing to admit.

[Interesting: 7 Major Reasons Why Men Lie to Women]

2. “I have a boyfriend”

woman talking to a man

When a girl tells you she has a boyfriend — whether it’s true or not — she’s saying she doesn’t want to talk to you.

It’s more like a nice, polite way that girls turn guys down without making them feel bad about themselves.

Should you call her out on it? No. Why?

You want to talk to people that want to talk to you. That’s how you get a good conversation. Sometimes guys have a terrible time talking with girls because the guy does all the work.

When you talk to someone who wants to talk to you, it doesn’t really matter that much that you’re a good conversationalist, you’ll just flow easily.

[Related read: 9 Signs She’s Pretending to Love You]

3. “I’m not like other girls”

A lot of girls tell this lie when a guy says something common with women that they don’t like.

For instance, if a guy says “I hate a girl who always has to wear heavy make up on her face all the time.”

To quickly make herself stand out she might say, “I’m not like other girls, I don’t really like wearing that much makeup because I don’t need it.”

Of course, this could be the truth. But on most occasions, when a girl lunches to defend herself in this manner, she’s probably lying about it.

4. “I’m really busy”

If you’re trying to set up a date with a girl but she couldn’t make it last weekend, this weekend, and the next, but she keeps responding to your texts, she’s probably not telling the truth.

The lie here is this: She is not busy, she’s just not interested in you.

Whenever you meet a woman and she’s always too busy to meet up, but she responds to your text, it doesn’t matter how responsive she is, the true indicator for liking you is meeting up with you.

If she likes you enough, not only will she make time for you, she might even try to make another plan for the both of you if the first doesn’t work for her.

For instance, she might say to you “I’m busy this weekend, but are you free next week?” She might be busy, but she can’t be too busy for a guy she likes.

[Also read: 4 Subtle Lies Men Tell Women, According to Psychologist]

5. Her body count

man and woman looking at each other

Women know they’re going to be judged about the number of sexual partners they’ve had, so most of them will lie about it when they are asked.

This is especially true if it’s still early on in the relationship and the girl cares a lot about what the man thinks about her.

Here’s the thing: When a girl likes you, she doesn’t want you to think that she is a slut. She also doesn’t want you to perceive her as someone easy to get. Why?

Society and religion condemn women who are easy to win over. A lot of people prejudge women based on how many people they’ve had sex with.

They assume she has slept with no one, then she’s prudent. If she has slept with a lot of guys, she’s a slut. Yes, it’s a double standard, and it sucks. But it’s the reality.

6. “He’s just a friend”

A lot of girls tell this lie mainly under two conditions.

Firstly, when she gets asked by her man about a male friend she likes to spend time with.

The second reason for this lie is ego. And in this case, they say it to deny a guy they like because their friends don’t find him attractive enough.

For instance, if she’s having a conversation with her female friend and the friend says something unpleasant about her male friend like “He’s not that cute,” or “He’s not my type,” if she’s insecure, she’ll quickly deny having anything serious with the guy.

“He’s just a friend and I don’t really want anything from him,” she might say. But within her, she knows the guy is very much the kind of person she’ll like to be with.

Of course, this will not happen with all girls. But if a girl is insecure and focuses more on what people think of her than what she wants for herself, she’s more likely to tell a lie like this one.

7. “I am fine”

This one isn’t just for ladies, it’s a lie we all tell once in a while. And it’s for good reason.

First of all, not everyone likes to attract sympathy to themselves when they have problems.

And “I am fine” just happens to be the perfect, easy phrase to put people off without letting them know the details.

Furthermore, sometimes there are just things going on in our minds that we can’t put in words. Other times, we don’t just think the people around us will understand.

The bottom line is, if a girl’s looking sad, but tells you she’s fine chances are, she’s lying about what’s really troubling her.

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Anita Oge

Meet Anita, a relationship writer with a passion for helping people navigate the complexities of love and dating. With a background in information science, she has a wealth of knowledge and insight to share. Her writing is sure to leave you feeling empowered and inspired.

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