When it comes to friendships between guys, there are some unwritten rules – a code, if you will – that every man instinctively knows.
These rules, collectively known as the “Bro Code”, form a sacred bond among men, a guide that helps navigate the sometimes complex and often unpredictable journey of “bromance”.
What Are Bro Code Rules?
In the simplest terms, bro code refers to an unwritten set of rules or conduct that exists between guys, a guideline to live by amongst buddies.
Now, these rules aren’t engraved on a stone tablet or printed in a fancy handbook (well, unless you’re a fan of Barney Stinson from ‘How I Met Your Mother’).
Yet, somehow, all men seem to know them, understand them, and follow them.
Ranging from “Bros before pros” to “Don’t date your bro’s ex”, these unwritten laws govern friendship ethics among men.
However, remember that every rule in the Bro Code serves one purpose: to respect and protect your friendship with your bros.
Rule 1: Bros Before Pros
Unbreakable, undeniable, unarguable. Your friends were there before any romantic partner, and chances are, they’ll stick around much longer.
Now, I’m not saying you should ditch your date at a fancy restaurant to go play pool with the gang. This point is about giving respect and consideration to your friendships while dating.
Ever noticed how your friend’s face sinks a little when you cancel plans last minute because your date decided to make impromptu plans?
That right there, my friends, is the essence of this rule. Your romantic relationships are important, sure, but they shouldn’t overshadow your friendships.
In fact, they ought to coexist in harmony. A healthy balance is essential.
[Related: 15 Reasons Why Men Are Giving Up on Dating]
Rule 2: Don’t Over-Sell Yourself
As much as you’d like to impress your date, don’t oversell yourself.
We all want to put our best foot forward, be the knight in shining armor, but it’s necessary not to lose yourself in the process.
Authenticity is a rarity these days, and it’s worth more than gold.
Think about how your date would feel if you boasted about being a CEO when you’re an intern. Yeah, not a pretty picture. So, authenticity is key here.
It’s okay to be an intern, to be in the process of building your career. Honesty is attractive.
Instead of setting up a façade and weaving a web of lies, try being the real you. I guarantee you, she’s going to appreciate it.
Rule 3: Your Date, Your Wallet
If you’re the one who asked her out, it’s only fair you foot the bill. This doesn’t mean you have to spend a small fortune, however.
Be considerate, pick a place she likes and feels comfortable. This rule isn’t about flashing your money, it’s about showing her you can take the lead, and you’re considerate about her feelings.
And another thing, don’t make a big deal about paying. It’s a courteous gesture, not a favor.
Be casual about it. Because when you make it a big deal, it puts her in an awkward position, and trust me, you don’t want that.
[Related: 10 Biggest Dating Mistakes Guys Make With Women]
Rule 4: No Ghosting, Be Honest
The fourth one is a big one in the dating world these days. No ghosting, be honest. Ghosting isn’t cool, it’s cowardly.
If you’re not into her, tell her. She deserves that respect. I understand, those conversations can be hard, but they’re a part of being a grown-up.
Imagine yourself eagerly waiting for a response from your date, but all you get is… silence. Days turn into weeks, and weeks into months, yet there’s no sign of them.
Feels horrible, doesn’t it? Now, why would you want to do that to someone else? You wouldn’t, right?
This rule requires courage and honesty. You’re not leading anyone on, you’re not giving false hope, and most importantly, you’re giving closure.
So, guys, when you’re tempted to disappear without a word, think about the golden rule of treating others how you want to be treated.
Rule 5: Space – The Final Frontier
We all need our personal space, don’t we? Even when you’re dating, space is essential.
You don’t want to smother her, do you? She has a life outside of you, just as you do outside of her.
Have you ever felt suffocated when someone was too clingy? Not a great feeling, is it? Now, you wouldn’t want your date to feel the same way about you.
You see, it’s about respect and understanding. Respecting her personal space and understanding that she has a life beyond your relationship. It’s healthy and absolutely necessary.
Give her space, let her breathe, let her miss you. Keep in mind, absence makes the heart grow fonder.
[Read: A Shy Guy’s Guide to Dating Beautiful Women]
Rule 6: Communicate
You remember that time when you were excitedly talking about your favorite football team, but all she did was nod and glance at her phone?
Didn’t feel so good, did it? Now, don’t be that person. Communication is about listening just as much as it’s about talking.
Engage with her, connect with her, and listen to her. Your date is not an interview session about you. It’s about getting to know each other, understanding each other.
Rule 7: No Ex Talk, Please
Bringing up your past relationships on a date is a big no-no. You’re there to get to know each other, not your pasts. Let’s not dig up old graves, shall we?
Ever been on a date where she kept on ranting about her ex? It felt like you were on a date with him, not her. Now, why would you want to do the same thing to her?
Talking about your ex not only ruins the mood but also gives the impression that you’re not over them. That’s not the signal you want to send, is it?
Focus on the now and the future, not the past. You’re with her, not your ex. You’re building a new connection, a new story. Leave the past where it belongs, in the past.
[Related: Dating Tips For Men]
Rule 8: Be a Gentleman
In a world where chivalry is considered dead, be the guy who brings it back to life. Hold the door open, pull out her chair, walk her to the door. Small gestures, big impact.
Chivalry isn’t about being old-fashioned; it’s about showing respect and care. It’s about making her feel special.
Chivalry never goes out of style. It sets you apart, makes you memorable. In a world full of guys trying to impress with flashy gestures, be the guy who impresses with kindness and respect.
Rule 9: The Two-Day Texting Rule is Dead
Seriously, chuck it out the window. Waiting two days to text after a date is like waiting two days to open a present. It makes no sense. You like her, she likes you. Why play games?
Picture yourself nervously waiting for that follow-up text after a fantastic date. You wait for a day, two days, three… how’s that making you feel?
Not so great, right? Now, why put her through that torment? Just pick up the phone and text her!
A simple text doesn’t make you desperate or needy; it makes you considerate. So, don’t let these antiquated rules dictate your actions. Be bold, be brave, send that text!
Rule 10: Keep The Phones Away
Yes, you heard it right. Your date doesn’t need to compete with your phone for attention. It’s a date, not a social media checking contest.
Be present, be engaged, and for goodness sake, put that phone away!
You’ve seen it before, right? Sitting across from someone, and all they do is scroll through their phone, oblivious to your existence.
Doesn’t feel great, does it? Now, why would you want to make her feel the same way?
Phones can wait, moments can’t. The smile she shares, the story she tells, the joke she cracks – these are the moments you don’t want to miss. They make the memories, not the latest tweet or Instagram post.
Rule 11: Keep Your Promises
A promise made should be a promise kept. Whether it’s about calling her at a particular time or planning a future date, make sure you do what you say. A man is as good as his word, after all.
Remember the disappointment you felt when someone broke a promise? That sinking feeling in your heart? Now, why would you want to be the cause of that for someone else?
Keeping your promises shows you’re reliable and trustworthy, qualities most people seek in a partner. And believe me, a broken promise is harder to fix than a broken mirror.
Rule 12: Be Yourself
Don’t pretend to be someone you’re not just to impress her. Be you, because you are awesome!
Imagine being with someone who’s constantly pretending. Feels like you’re with a stranger, doesn’t it?
Now, why would you want her to feel the same way? You’re enough, just as you are. Your quirks, your passions, your dreams – they make you, you.
The right person will love you for who you are, not for who you pretend to be. So, embrace your individuality, celebrate your uniqueness. And remember, in the grand theatre of life, the best role you can play is yourself.
Are bro code rules the same for all guys?
The Bro Code, in its essence, forms a universal guideline for male friendships.
The core principles, such as loyalty, respect, and looking out for one another, remain the same no matter where you go.
The idea of “Bros before pros” is as applicable in Tokyo as it is in New York.
However, the specifics might vary slightly depending on cultural norms, personal beliefs, and individual relationships.
For example, while one group of friends may have a strict rule about not dating a friend’s sister, another group may be completely fine with it as long as there’s genuine affection and respect. So, while the fundamental ethos of the Bro Code remains the same, the interpretation can slightly differ based on the context.
Can you break the bro code?
Technically, you can. The Bro Code isn’t legally binding or enforced by some kind of bro police. But should you?
That’s a whole different question. Breaking the Bro Code can damage trust, respect, and even the very foundation of a friendship.
Remember, the Bro Code is all about respect and loyalty amongst friends. Ignoring these unwritten rules might result in hurt feelings, misunderstandings, or potential fall-outs.
So, while there’s no one stopping you from breaking the bro code, think about the possible consequences before you act. After all, a good bro respects the code.
What if someone breaks the bro code?
Here’s the thing about the Bro Code. It’s an unspoken pact, a gentleman’s agreement if you will.
If someone breaks it, there won’t be legal consequences, but there might be social ones. A bro who consistently breaks the code might find himself outside the circle of trust.
If a bro code is broken, it’s essential to address the issue directly. Clear communication can help resolve misunderstandings and mend fences. Remember, mistakes happen. What’s important is how we deal with them and learn from them.
So, if a bro code is broken, have a chat, make amends, and move on stronger together.
- All photos from freepik.com