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The time it takes for a guy to ask a girl to be his girlfriend varies greatly. It isn’t a one-size-fits-all situation. 

For some, it could be after a few weeks of dating, while for others, it might be months. What’s crucial is that both parties are comfortable and ready to take that step.

Not everyone moves at the same pace. It’s possible for one person to feel ready to commit sooner than the other. It’s a matter of emotions and timing, and rushing can lead to unnecessary strain. 

So, a man might wait until he senses that the woman he’s interested in also feels the same level of commitment.

With that said, we can generally categorize the timeframe a guy will ask you out into these seven phases. 

Stage 1: Initial Attraction

When dooes guys ask you to be his girlfriend

This is the thrill of the start, when the eyes meet across a crowded room. Or maybe it’s online these days, right? 

The initial attraction stage is crucial and electric. The guy usually feels a physical or mental attraction, like, ‘Hey, she’s kinda cool’ or ‘Wow, she’s drop-dead gorgeous!’ 

The timelines? Well, it varies like different kinds of spices in a cooking pot. 

Some guys feel this initial attraction instantly, while for others it might simmer slowly over a few weeks or months.

Now, for some, this attraction is purely physical, but that’s not always the case. It could also be her smile, the way she laughs, or her brilliant mind. 

You know, the ‘I could listen to her talk about quantum physics all day’ kind of vibe. This stage is all about the spark, the infatuation, the magic that gets the ball rolling.

Yet, we all know that initial attraction isn’t enough to ask someone to be your girlfriend, right? It’s like the tip of the iceberg; there’s so much more beneath the surface. 

The initial attraction stage is more about curiosity, like the first chapter of a book. It’s like opening the door to possibility.

And let’s not forget that attraction is a two-way street. He’s attracted to her, sure. But does she feel the same? Will it develop into something more or fade away like a shooting star? Only time will tell.

[Related: 7 Signs He Wants To Make You His Girlfriend]

Stage 2: Getting to Know Each Other

This one’s a ride, isn’t it? The ‘Getting to Know Each Other’ stage. It’s like a fantastic journey into an unknown land. 

Those long conversations, the shared laughs, finding common interests, and yes, the cute disagreements too!

This stage could last a few weeks or several months, depending on how often they meet or talk. It’s the period where they learn about each other’s passions, dreams, quirks, and pet peeves.

Think of it as being explorers. They’re exploring each other’s worlds, their personalities, their past, and their ambitions. It’s a critical stage, isn’t it? 

It’s like laying the foundation of a building, the stronger it is, the higher the building can go.

But here’s the deal. In this stage, they’re not just learning about each other; they’re also gauging compatibility. 

They’re asking themselves questions like, ‘Do I feel comfortable around her?’ ‘Do we vibe together?’ ‘Can I see a future with her?’ 

And she’s likely asking the same about him. Exciting and nerve-wracking, isn’t it?

Stage 3: Developing Feelings

How long before a guy wants you as his girlfirend

Well, the heart wants what it wants, doesn’t it? This stage is where things start getting a little intense. 

The guy begins to realize that he likes the girl not just as a friend, but more. He finds himself thinking about her more often and looks forward to seeing or talking to her.

Usually, this stage comes after they’ve spent a significant amount of time together. 

There’s no fixed timeline here. It could be a few weeks into knowing each other or several months. It’s all about how he feels.

This is the stage when he might feel butterflies in his stomach every time he sees her or when his heart races at the sound of her message. 

He begins to miss her when she’s not around. And that’s a beautiful feeling, isn’t it?

Yet, this stage can be emotionally intense. Sometimes it’s the euphoria of love; at other times, it’s the anxiety of uncertainty. 

‘Does she like me back?’ ‘Am I reading the signs right?’ Such questions may swirl around in his mind, making it an exhilarating yet emotionally charged stage.

[Read: 15 Qualities Of A Good Girlfriend That Guys Like]

Stage 4: Testing the Waters

Now we’re getting to the interesting part, right? Testing the Waters is where the guy starts to subtly reveal his feelings to see how the girl reacts. 

It’s like putting one foot in the water to gauge the temperature before diving in.

In this stage, the guy might start by giving subtle hints. Perhaps, he might compliment her more often or try to spend more time with her. 

He’s looking for signs of reciprocal feelings, like returning his flirtations or spending more time with him as well.

Remember, though, this is a delicate stage. It’s like playing a game of chess, where every move needs to be calculated yet casual. 

He doesn’t want to scare her away by revealing too much, too soon. But at the same time, he wants to know if he stands a chance.

Moreover, it’s not just about what she says; it’s also about what she doesn’t say. Her body language, the look in her eyes, her comfort level around him – all these are telltale signs he’s looking for. 

This stage could last a few days, weeks, or even months, depending on the guy and the circumstances.

Stage 5: Confirmation of Mutual Feelings

Guy and girlfriend

This stage is filled with anticipation. It’s the part where the guy is fairly sure that the girl likes him back.

It’s often during this stage that they share some intimate moments or deep conversations. 

The guy feels a strong emotional connection and is pretty sure it’s reciprocated. It’s like standing at the edge of the cliff, ready to jump into the sea of love.

This stage can be sweet but also terrifying, right? The guy is almost sure she likes him back, but there’s always that tiny doubt. 

What if he’s misunderstood her friendly gestures for something more? What if she doesn’t feel the same?

[Related: 10 Reasons Why He Wants You When He Already Has a Girlfriend]

Stage 6: Decision Time

Here comes the big one – Decision Time. This stage is where the guy decides whether to ask the girl to be his girlfriend or not. It’s the culmination of all the previous stages. 

It’s the moment of truth.

During this stage, the guy does a mental pros and cons list. He thinks about their compatibility, his feelings for her, and the potential future they could have. 

He also considers any potential risks or obstacles, like distance or timing.

He might also seek advice from his friends or family. He’s looking for reassurance, a final push, or a warning sign. This stage is full of introspection and contemplation.

Remember, this stage is significant because it’s not just about his feelings anymore. He’s also considering her feelings, her comfort, and the potential impact on their relationship. 

It’s a pivotal point that could change the course of their relationship forever.

Stage 7: The Proposal

When a guy asks you to be his girlfriend

Whether it’s over a romantic dinner or during a casual conversation, the guy finally gathers his courage and pops the question. 

It’s a moment filled with anticipation, hope, and vulnerability.

And then, the waiting game begins. Will she say yes, or will she say no? 

Regardless of the answer, he’s taken a significant step. He’s bared his heart and made his intentions clear. It’s a brave move, don’t you think?

The proposal isn’t just about the words, though. It’s also about the intent, the emotion, and the promise. 

The guy is not just asking her to be his girlfriend; he’s also promising to be there for her, to respect her, and to value her.


Understand that every person and every relationship is unique. While these seven stages provide a general overview, individual experiences might differ. 

Some guys might skip a stage or two, or perhaps the order might be different. It all depends on the guy, the girl, and their unique relationship.

It’s not just about the timeline; it’s also about the journey, the experiences, and the emotions. After all, love isn’t a race; it’s a journey to be enjoyed and cherished.


Is there a specific timeline to follow in these stages?

There isn’t a one-size-fits-all timeline when it comes to these stages of a budding relationship. 

It’s like the pace at which a flower blooms – some do it quickly, while others take their sweet time. 

The time spent in each stage is subjective, depending on a multitude of factors like individual personalities, communication frequency, and the depth of their connection.

It’s crucial to remember that rushing through stages might lead to shaky foundations, while dragging things out could lead to lost interest. So it’s all about finding the right balance. 

Some might spend weeks in the initial stages, while others may swiftly move to the declaration phase. It’s a unique dance for every couple.

Can a guy skip any of these stages?

Of course, these stages aren’t hard and fast rules set in stone. Consider them more like guidelines that tend to occur in many relationships. 

Some guys might skip a stage or two based on their personality or situation. 

For instance, they might jump from the initial attraction stage straight to developing feelings if they’ve been friends with the girl for a while.

It’s also important to remember that every person and every relationship is unique. The way a guy navigates these stages can vary based on their personality, past experiences, or even cultural norms. 

So yes, stages can be skipped or reshuffled, but the underlying emotions and considerations often remain the same.

What if the girl doesn’t reciprocate the feelings?

It’s a tough spot to be in, but it’s essential to remember that everyone has the right to their feelings. 

If a girl doesn’t reciprocate the feelings, the guy should respect her decision and feelings. It’s disappointing, no doubt, but it’s part of the journey.

In such cases, the guy could step back and give her some space. It might also be beneficial to have a clear and open conversation about their feelings. 

They could still maintain their friendship, but boundaries might need to be redefined. It’s crucial to handle such situations with maturity, empathy, and respect.

Is it necessary for the guy to be the one to propose the relationship?

While tradition often dictates that the guy is the one to propose the relationship, this isn’t a hard rule.

Relationships are about two people, and either person can take the initiative. If a girl feels that she’s ready to take the relationship to the next level, she can absolutely propose to the guy.

In the end, what matters is the mutual understanding and shared feelings between them. 

Whether the guy proposes or the girl does, it’s about expressing their love and desire to take their relationship to the next level. So, ladies, if you feel like popping the question, go for it!

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Destiny Femi

Destiny Femi is a dating coach whose work has helped transform the love lives of countless people. With a writing style that is both insightful and relatable, Destiny has amassed a following of hundreds of thousands of readers who turn to him for advice on everything from finding the perfect partner to maintaining a healthy relationship. Through his articles he has inspired people around the world to become more confident, authentic, and successful in their dating life.

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