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Understanding the feelings and intentions of a man who is naturally guarded makes a relationship a bit more complex. Why?

Guarded men, due to past experiences or their nature, tend to build walls around their emotions. 

They may shy away from vulnerability, making it harder for their partners to gauge where they truly stand. 

Yet, love has a powerful way of chipping away at even the most formidable barriers.

If you’re in a relationship with such a man, then it’s understandable that you’ll want to understand the signs that he’s falling in love with you. And on this note, here are ten clues for you. 

1. He Starts Sharing His Deepest Thoughts

There’s something incredibly intimate about sharing your deepest fears, hopes, and dreams with someone. For a guarded man, this might take a bit of time. 

It’s not that he doesn’t trust you; it’s just that he’s spent a significant portion of his life keeping his feelings locked away. 

But as he starts falling in love, those walls that he’s meticulously built around himself begin to crumble.

It might begin with a casual conversation about his childhood or an admission about a personal challenge he’s faced in the past. Over time, these moments become more frequent. 

He starts letting you in on the things that have shaped him, the good and the bad. 

2. He Prioritizes Your Happiness

A guarded man often protects himself first. It’s not out of selfishness, but rather a mechanism to avoid potential pain. But as he falls in love, a shift happens. 

Suddenly, your happiness starts taking precedence. He might do little things, like getting that dessert you mentioned once or trying to cheer you up when you’ve had a bad day.

These actions, while seemingly small, are monumental for someone who’s protective of their emotions. They indicate that he’s not just thinking about himself anymore. 

You’re becoming an integral part of his thoughts and actions. It’s no longer just about protecting his own heart, but also about ensuring the happiness of someone he deeply cares for.

Over time, these gestures might become more pronounced. He’ll start planning surprises or taking you to places he thinks you’ll love. 

And while he might not always vocalize it, his actions scream his intentions for you.

[Related: 10 Signs a Guy is Marking His Territory in a Relationship]

3. His Body Language Opens Up

Often, we don’t realize how much we’re revealing through our non-verbal cues. For a guarded man, his body language is usually reserved and closed off, a reflection of his inner emotional state. 

But love has this magical way of changing even the most subtle of gestures.

You might notice that he’s more touchy-feely than before. Maybe he holds your hand more often or finds reasons to be close to you. 

His posture might change, from being closed off to inviting. He’s no longer shying away from physical closeness but actively seeking it.

The eyes, often referred to as the windows to the soul, are another giveaway. You’ll catch him looking at you differently, with an intensity and warmth that wasn’t there before. 

His gaze will linger, and the way he looks at you will speak volumes. It’s as if he’s trying to communicate his feelings without saying a word

4. He Makes Future Plans With You

signs a guarded man is falling in love

Talk of the future is always a big deal, especially for someone who’s guarded. The idea of making commitments or thinking too far ahead can be daunting. 

But, love has a unique power to make us look beyond the present. So, as this man’s feelings grow, he starts weaving you into his plans for the future. 

It might begin with small mentions, like suggesting a movie you both could watch next month or mentioning a concert that’s happening in a few months.

Gradually, the timeline extends. He’ll discuss vacations, holidays, or even where he sees himself in the next few years, always with you in the picture. 

5. He Introduces You to His Inner Circle

Most people have a close-knit group of friends or family members whom they deeply value. These relationships are built on trust, understanding, and years of shared experiences. 

Bringing someone new into this fold is a significant move. For a guarded man, it’s even more monumental. By introducing you to his inner circle, he’s taking a step that might have been unthinkable before.

Seeing you blend with his loved ones, watching them accept and care for you, brings him a level of joy that’s hard to describe. 

It’s not just about showing off his partner; it’s about merging two essential parts of his life. Plus, it’s a way for him to gauge how well you fit into the broader picture of his world.

[Related: 10 Signs an Emotionally Unavailable Man is in Love With You]

6. He Remembers the Little Things

The offhand comment you made about your favorite childhood candy, the story about how you love rainy weather, or even the way you mentioned wanting to try a specific dish – he remembers them all. 

Not because he’s keeping a record, but because every detail about you fascinates him.

Each memory is like a puzzle piece, helping him understand and know you better. He’s genuinely interested in your likes, dislikes, past experiences, and dreams. 

This attentiveness is a clear sign of his growing affection.

Acting on these memories is the cherry on top. It could be as simple as buying that candy you mentioned or suggesting a date night on a rainy evening. 

These gestures, rooted in his memory of your conversations, underline how much he cares.

7. He Seeks Your Opinion

How to make a guarded man fall in love

Everyone faces challenges, be it in their professional lives, personal decisions, or even trivial daily choices. As this guarded man grows closer to you, he begins valuing your perspective. 

He’ll discuss challenges at work, ask for advice on a personal dilemma, or even seek your viewpoint on mundane things.

Your opinions matter to him, not just because he respects you, but because he wants to incorporate your perspective into his decisions. It’s his way of subtly intertwining his life with yours.

[Also read: 8 Signs A Broken Man Loves You]

8. He Finds Comfort in Silence With You

There’s a popular belief that true connection is not just about the moments filled with laughter and conversations but also about those silent moments when words aren’t needed. 

For someone who’s guarded, opening up can be challenging, but finding comfort in silent moments with you shows how at ease he feels. 

You might find yourselves driving together without talking, simply enjoying the shared company, or sitting side by side, lost in thoughts, but feeling connected.

These quiet moments indicate a deep comfort level. It says that he doesn’t always feel the pressure to keep the conversation going or entertain. 

Instead, he’s content just being with you, relishing the calmness that your presence brings.

9. He Celebrates Your Successes

How does a guarded man test you?

Genuine love means rejoicing in each other’s successes. So, noticing that he’s genuinely thrilled about your achievements, no matter how small or big, is telling. 

Whether you’ve managed to bake the perfect cake, received a promotion at work, or accomplished a personal goal, his excitement is palpable. 

He might throw a surprise celebration, share the news with others, or just spend the evening listening to your experiences.

Such reactions reveal a selfless side of his love. He’s genuinely invested in your happiness and growth. 

For him, your wins feel like his own, and he wants to be there, cheering you on at every step.

[Read: 10 Signs Someone Is Emotionally Damaged]

10. He Shows Up For You

One of the most telling signs of a man falling in love is his unwavering presence. Be it a tough day at work, a family gathering, or a casual evening out with friends, he ensures he’s there for you. 

He might lend a listening ear when you’re stressed, accompany you to events, or just be a comforting presence on a dull day.

It’s also about the regular, day-to-day actions that show he’s genuinely invested in the relationship. It speaks of a commitment that goes beyond fleeting emotions.

By consistently showing up, he’s proving that he’s ready to be a stable figure in your life. 

He’s not just in it for the good times but is also prepared to navigate the challenges and mundane moments with you.


How do you make a guarded man fall in love with you?

Building a relationship with a guarded man requires patience and understanding. 

Firstly, it’s essential to create a safe space where he feels comfortable sharing his feelings without judgment. Demonstrating trustworthiness and consistency can help him lower his defenses over time. 

It’s not about trying to change him, but about offering the kind of environment where he can freely express himself. 

Secondly, showing genuine interest in his life, listening actively, and valuing his experiences can bridge the gap. 

As he sees your authenticity and feels that you genuinely care, he’ll gradually become more open to the idea of love.

How does a guarded man test you?

Guarded men, often shaped by past experiences, can be cautious about whom they let into their lives. 

They might “test” a partner, not out of malice, but to determine if they can trust them with their vulnerabilities. 

One way they might do this is by observing how you react to their moments of vulnerability. They’ll be keenly aware of whether you show understanding or dismissiveness. 

Another “test” might involve them pulling away temporarily to see if you’ll stick around or if you’ll distance yourself. 

This isn’t about playing games but rather a subconscious way for them to gauge the stability and potential longevity of the relationship.

[Interesting: 12 Signs a Guy is Claiming You]

How do you know if a man is emotionally attached?

How do you know if a man is emotionally attached?

Emotional attachment often manifests in consistent and caring actions. A man who’s emotionally attached will prioritize your happiness and well-being. 

He’ll remember details about your conversations, show up for you during significant events or challenges, and consider your feelings in decisions he makes. 

Moreover, he’ll invest time in understanding and connecting with you, even in mundane daily activities. 

Emotional attachment isn’t just about grand romantic gestures; it’s more about the day-to-day actions that demonstrate he’s genuinely invested in the bond you share.

What can make a man guarded in relationships?

Several factors can lead a man to become guarded in relationships. 

Past traumas, be it from childhood or previous romantic involvements, can significantly influence how one approaches love. 

Betrayals, rejections, or a history of unstable relationships can make someone wary of opening up again. 

Sometimes, societal pressures or the way men are conditioned to perceive masculinity (i.e., not showing vulnerability) can also play a role in their guarded behavior. 

Understanding that their guarded nature is often a defense mechanism, rather than a sign of disinterest, can be key to approaching such relationships with empathy and patience.

[Also read: 7 Traits of an Extremely Insecure Partner]


  • All photos from freepik.com

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Destiny Femi

Destiny Femi is a dating coach whose work has helped transform the love lives of countless people. With a writing style that is both insightful and relatable, Destiny has amassed a following of hundreds of thousands of readers who turn to him for advice on everything from finding the perfect partner to maintaining a healthy relationship. Through his articles he has inspired people around the world to become more confident, authentic, and successful in their dating life.

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