If you’re a highly sensitive person and you successfully grew up and harnessed your uniqueness, you’re a hero.
The world is constantly trying to change highly sensitive people. They call them introverted, weird, nerd, antisocial, etc.
And because of these labels, most sensitive people try to become every other thing but themselves. Some succeed, but for most, it’s always going to be a struggle claiming that you like the loud noise and the constant need to feel hyper ecstatic all the time. It’s exhausting for sensitive people.
The truth is, sensitive people are special. Their natural predilection for aloneness, calmness, and introspection, makes them best soothed for the depth of thinking required to make remarkable things.
Are you one of them?
If you are, don’t feel pressured to change who you are. In a loud and highly distracted world like ours, we need more people who appreciate focus and depth. That said, here are the best signs you’re a highly sensitive person.
1. You appreciate your alone time
There’s a difference between just spending time alone and loving to spend time alone.
If you like to spend time alone, you’re already in the special minority. Why? Most people will rather inflict pain than sit with themselves. This has been shown by studies.
A group of people were asked to choose between being alone and experiencing an electric shock. Guess what? They chose electric shock.
This study may be surprising to many people at first. How will you choose electric shock over just being alone? But don’t be so fast in thinking you wouldn’t do the same.
Think about it. Most people are already choosing pain over boredom in one form or the other. It doesn’t have to be through electric shock alone.
When you choose to go out with toxic friends rather than be at home and enjoy your own company, you’re choosing pain over being alone.
When you get addicted to drugs, just because you have a lot of alone time, you’re choosing pain over being alone. We do it in many ways, and electric shock is probably the least harmful (psychologically).
So if you like to be alone, you have something most people don’t. It means your mind functions differently. Only someone who has an organized mind can stand being alone. You’re special.
Don’t fall for the lie that loving to be alone makes you some kind of antisocial or weirdo. That’s not true. In reality, most of those who criticize you will do anything to have a mind as calm as yours.
2. They are often highly creative people
A large part of what it takes to be creative comes from hard work. But let’s face it. If you can’t stand to be alone, if you can’t handle the drudgery and pain of boredom, you can’t master anything.
Robert Greene put it best in his remarkable book, Mastery,
“Most people don’t have the patience to absorb their minds in the fine points and minutiae that are intrinsically part of their work. They are in a hurry to create effects and make a splash.”
Great minds, writers, mystics, poets, songwriters, etc., are often people who love to spend time alone. Carl Jung often took days off away from work to nurture his ideas, especially during the time that led to his discovery of analytic psychology.
Bill Gates is famously known for his think weeks when he takes two weeks out of a year to stay in a cabin.
It takes more than hard work to be creative. You have to know how to be alone. As the creative genius, Nikola Tesla once said,
“Be alone, that is the secret of invention; be alone, that is when ideas are born. That is why many of the earthly miracles have had their genesis in humble surroundings.”
3. You find mindful things more satisfying
Most people can’t handle reading because they find it boring. Anything loud, fast, intoxicating, etc., makes them feel alive.
But the thing with these kinds of people is that they come to depend on external sources to feel good. Leave them to themselves and they will do anything to keep themselves distracted (or unconscious).
A sensitive person doesn’t need to be high all the time. They find calmness satisfying. Mindful activities like reading, listening to slow music, meditating, having a fun time with their families, etc., makes them feel alive.
According to the psychotherapist, Tom Falkenstein, one of the defining characteristics of sensitive people is their depth of processing. And for this reason, they tend to have a predilection for philosophical and spiritual ideas.
If you’re like this, you probably feel pressured by the things you see all around you. The media makes you feel like you’re not cool – or alive – if you’re not in a club jumping and getting high to loud music.
Don’t fall for that.
In reality, we all find different things satisfying. If the glamor and loud music work for you, great. But if you’re a sensitive person, don’t think people who are always hyperactive have better lives than you.
Interesting: Women With These 6 Traits Are Diamonds In The Rough
4. You have few but deep relationships
Sensitive people don’t build friendships easily, and this is partly because they prefer their alone time. But the major reason for this is that sensitive people are looking for something deep when they build relationships.
Whether it’s romantic or casual friendships, they don’t rush it; they take their time to let you in. But when they let you in, you can be sure they have your back.
This is the major reason why it’s hard for sensitive people to move on after a breakup. First, they think of all the emotional investment they’ve put into the relationship, then they think about how they’ll start the process all over again.
They are selective about who they allow into their lives. And this isn’t because they hate people. They are just more sensitive to the drama of toxic people.
5. The little things often catch your attention
According to Susan Whitbourne, a professor of psychology, one of the upsides of being a highly sensitive person is that you have aesthetic sensitivity. For this reason, a beautiful work of art or a great song will tend to touch more deeply.
When you have a calm mind, certain little things people often ignore stand out to you. Things like the bright color of the sky, the mountains, the feel of a cool breeze bouncing against your skin, etc.
Furthermore, a sensitive person tends to be more empathetic. They are likely to pick the mood of people. When they are watching a sad movie, they are more likely to cry. Sadly, some people like to use this empathic side against them.
A sensitive person also tends to see through people’s intentions. They are observant. Besides the fact that they feel your energy, certain gestures that go unnoticed by most people are caught by them because of their attentiveness.
Being a highly sensitive person has its downsides, and it’s no doubt still a challenging thing for most people.
For instance, a highly sensitive person might feel isolated. And the attempt to fit in might lead to internal conflict and loneliness.
Furthermore, people tend to want to take advantage of sensitive people. And some just have fun picking on them. This is why they tend to be victims of bullies.
But there’s no personality without its downsides. The bottom line is that being a sensitive person isn’t a curse. It’s a unique personality you can learn to harness.