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When you’re in a relationship, it’s normal to want everything to go smoothly and feel good about being together. 

But sometimes, things aren’t as perfect as they seem, and it’s important to know the signs that might indicate your relationship isn’t healthy. 

If your boyfriend’s behavior makes you feel bad about yourself, isolated from friends, or constantly stressed, it might be a sign that the relationship is toxic.

Recognizing the signs of a toxic relationship can be tough, especially when you care a lot about someone. 

You might hope things will get better or think that this is just how relationships are supposed to be. 

But understanding these warning signs can help you decide what’s best for your happiness and well-being.

In this article, we’ll go through 12 signs that your boyfriend might be toxic. 

Keep reading to learn more about each sign so you can make informed decisions about your relationship.

1. He often criticizes you, even in small things

When someone constantly finds fault in what you do, it can really wear you down. 

Imagine your boyfriend commenting negatively on how you dress, the way you talk, or even your choice of friends. 

It’s tough when the little things you do always seem to be wrong in his eyes. 

Over time, this persistent criticism can make you doubt your own choices and self-worth, which is a red flag in a relationship.

What makes it worse is if he does this in front of others. 

It’s one thing to discuss issues privately, but if he criticizes you publicly, it can feel like he’s undermining your confidence. 

That’s not what you’d expect from someone who’s supposed to support you. Healthy relationships are based on mutual respect and lifting each other up, not tearing one another down.

Lastly, notice how you feel after interacting with him. If you often feel worse about yourself, it might be time to reflect on the relationship. 

No one should make you feel consistently unhappy or inadequate. A supportive partner would want to see you happy and confident, not feeling bad about yourself.

2. He isolates you from friends and family

toxic boyfriend

A significant sign of a toxic relationship is when your boyfriend tries to cut you off from your support network. 

Perhaps he makes plans that just involve the two of you, all the time, and gets upset when you want to spend time with others. 

It’s not healthy when one person controls who the other can see or talk to.

Also, he might make you feel guilty for spending time with anyone but him. By making you feel bad about wanting to hang out with friends or family, he’s manipulating your emotions

This can lead to feeling lonely because you start seeing your loved ones less and less. 

Remember, in a healthy relationship, your partner would encourage your personal connections, not restrict them.

Another red flag is if he speaks negatively about the people you care about. 

By casting doubts about your friends’ or family’s intentions, he might be trying to make you feel like he’s the only one who truly understands or supports you. 

This tactic can make you more dependent on him, which is exactly what a toxic person wants.

[Also Read: 7 Toxic Guy Traits You Should Avoid]

3. He disregards your feelings and boundaries

Pay attention to how he reacts when you express your feelings or set boundaries

Someone who loves and respects you will take your feelings seriously and honor your boundaries.

In contrast, a toxic boyfriend might dismiss your emotions as overreactions or ignore your boundaries, making you feel like your feelings aren’t valid.

For instance, if you tell him you need some space and he keeps calling or texting you nonstop, that’s a clear sign he’s not respecting your wishes. 

Everyone needs personal space, and a caring partner understands that. Disregarding your need for space is a form of control, not affection.

Furthermore, keep an eye on how he handles disagreements. Does he listen and try to understand your point of view, or does he steamroll over your opinions? 

A partner who consistently dismisses or trivializes your thoughts and feelings can make you feel unvalued and invisible in the relationship. 

Healthy communication involves both partners respecting each other’s perspectives.

4. He makes you responsible for his emotions

Sometimes, a toxic boyfriend might make you feel like you’re the reason for his bad moods or problems. 

For example, he could say things like, “You’re making me angry” or “You’re the reason I’m sad.” It’s not fair for one person to blame their emotions on someone else. 

Everyone controls their own feelings.

When he has a bad day and blames you for it, this can put a lot of pressure on you. You might start walking on eggshells, trying to do everything perfectly so he won’t get upset. 

However, remember that you can’t control how someone else feels. Everyone should take responsibility for their own emotions.

Another aspect to watch for is his reaction when you’re happy and he’s not. 

Does he try to bring you down or make you feel guilty for being in a good mood? A loving partner would be happy to see you happy, not try to dampen your spirits.

5. He’s overly jealous or possessive

over possessive boyfriend

Jealousy is a common feeling, but too much of it can be a problem. 

A toxic boyfriend may get very jealous when you talk to other people, even if they’re just friends or coworkers. 

He might question you intensely about who you are talking to and what you talked about.

Being possessive can also mean he doesn’t want you to have your own hobbies or interests. 

He might get upset if you spend time doing things you enjoy without him. This kind of behavior can make you feel like you’re not free to live your own life.

He might check your phone or demand to know your passwords. This shows he doesn’t trust you, and trust is a must-have in any healthy relationship. 

You should feel respected and trusted, not watched or controlled.

6. He uses guilt to get his way

Pay attention to how he behaves when he wants something from you. 

A toxic boyfriend might try to make you feel guilty to manipulate you into doing what he wants. 

For instance, he might say, “You would do this if you loved me.” Using your feelings for him to get his way isn’t fair.

He might also bring up past favors or sacrifices he’s made as a way to guilt you into doing things. 

Remember, favors should be done freely, not as a way to keep score and demand payback later. Relationships are about give and take, not keeping a tally.

And when things don’t go his way, watch out for how often he plays the victim. This is another guilt tactic, making it seem like everything is against him and only you can fix it. 

Everyone faces challenges, but using them to manipulate someone’s feelings is a red flag.

[Interesting: 8 Things Good Men Never Do In A Relationship]

7. He lies or hides the truth

Honesty is the foundation of trust in any relationship. 

When a boyfriend lies to you or hides the truth, it can make you question everything else in the relationship. 

Even small lies can be a sign of bigger issues.

For example, he might lie about where he was or who he was with. These lies might seem minor, but they can indicate that he’s not being open with you. 

You might start feeling like you can’t trust what he says.

Also, watch for how he reacts when you catch him in a lie. Does he get defensive or try to blame you, or does he own up to it? 

Someone who lies and then refuses to take responsibility is showing you that they don’t respect the relationship enough to be truthful.

8. He makes fun of you in a mean way

boyfriend making fun of girlfriend

Sometimes, teasing happens in relationships, and it can be fun. But there’s a line that shouldn’t be crossed. 

A toxic boyfriend might make fun of you in ways that actually hurt. He could joke about your appearance, your intelligence, or your interests, and it doesn’t feel good. 

When teasing hurts more than it makes you laugh, that’s not okay.

Notice how you feel when he teases you. Are you laughing along, or does it make you feel small and embarrassed? 

Laughter in a relationship should be mutual, not one person getting laughs at the other’s expense.

Also, watch how he reacts when you tell him his jokes hurt you. Does he apologize and stop, or does he tell you that you’re just being too sensitive? 

Someone who cares about you will listen to your feelings and adjust their behavior, not dismiss your feelings.

9. He pressures you to do things you’re uncomfortable with

No one should ever make you do things that make you feel uncomfortable or scared. 

A toxic boyfriend might pressure you to break your own rules, like if you don’t want to drink alcohol or skip school, and he tries to convince you otherwise. 

Standing up for yourself is important, and a good partner would respect your choices.

He might also pressure you into being more physically intimate than you’re ready for. 

Remember, saying ‘no’ is your right, and it should be respected. A relationship should be a safe place where your boundaries are honored.

Another thing to consider is how he behaves when you stand firm on your decisions. 

Does he back off, or does he keep pushing and make you feel guilty? 

A respectful boyfriend will stop when you say no, not keep pressuring you or making you feel bad for your choices.

10. He’s always the victim

toxic boyfriend

A common trait in toxic relationships is one person always playing the victim. 

Your boyfriend might always make things seem like they’re someone else’s fault—including yours. 

He never takes responsibility for his own actions or mistakes. Instead, he points the finger at everyone else.

For example, if something goes wrong, instead of discussing it and admitting his part, he might say things like, “You made me do it,” or “I wouldn’t have messed up if you hadn’t distracted me.” 

This behavior avoids accountability and puts unnecessary blame on you.

Also, observe how he talks about past relationships or conflicts with others. Is he always the victim in every story he tells? 

If he never acknowledges any wrongdoing on his part in any situation, that’s a warning sign. It shows a lack of self-awareness and maturity.

11. He reacts badly to criticism

Everyone reacts differently to criticism, but how someone handles it can tell you a lot about them. 

A toxic boyfriend might react very badly if you criticize him, even if it’s gentle and constructive. He might get angry, defensive, or even turn the criticism back on you.

Watch how he handles situations where you or someone else points out a mistake he’s made. Does he listen and try to understand, or does he dismiss it and make excuses?

And notice whether he can admit faults at all. Being able to say “I was wrong” is a sign of maturity and strength.

Someone who can’t handle criticism might also struggle to grow and improve in a relationship.

12. He deliberately tries to make you feel insecure

When someone makes you feel unsure about yourself on purpose, it can really hurt. 

A toxic boyfriend might point out your insecurities or compare you to other people in ways that make you feel less confident. 

For example, he might say you’re not as good at something as someone else is, just to make you feel bad.

Notice how often he brings up things he knows you’re sensitive about. Maybe it’s about how you look, how you act in social situations, or even your skills at school or work. 

When someone loves you, they build you up, not tear you down.

Another way he might make you feel insecure is by acting like he might break up with you over small things

This keeps you worried about whether he’s happy with you. You should feel safe and stable in a relationship, not anxious and unsure.

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Destiny Femi

Destiny Femi is a dating coach whose work has helped transform the love lives of countless people. With a writing style that is both insightful and relatable, Destiny has amassed a following of hundreds of thousands of readers who turn to him for advice on everything from finding the perfect partner to maintaining a healthy relationship. Through his articles he has inspired people around the world to become more confident, authentic, and successful in their dating life.

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