Imagine this: You’re all set for a date with someone you’re really excited about.
You’ve picked out the perfect outfit, thought of some interesting conversation topics, and even cleared your schedule to make the day special.
But then, as the date approaches, something feels off. You can’t put your finger on it, but you start to wonder if he’s going to cancel the date.
In dating, it’s not uncommon to face this kind of uncertainty. Dating can be thrilling, full of butterflies, and the joy of getting to know someone new.
But it can also be nerve-wracking when you’re left wondering whether the person you’re supposed to meet is as invested in the date as you are.
No one likes the feeling of being stood up or having their plans cancelled at the last minute.
So, wouldn’t it be helpful to have some kind of early warning system? A way to pick up on certain signals that might suggest he’s going to cancel?
Well, that’s exactly what this article aims to provide. Here, we’re going to explore ten signs that might suggest a guy is thinking of cancelling your date.
1. His Communication Style Changes
His texting style is different, and his replies are slower than usual.
When someone is looking forward to a date, they’re often quick to reply to messages and engage in conversation.
Sure, people have off days and sometimes life gets busy. But when the tone and tempo of communication change dramatically without explanation, it’s possible he’s rethinking the date.
The shift might not be evident at first, but a consistent pattern over time can be revealing. You might see a drop in his eagerness to chat, or his messages might suddenly become terse and perfunctory.
His excuses for late replies may sound reasonable, but the consistency of these changes is often a telltale sign.
Of course, everyone has a unique communication style. Some people naturally take longer to reply – for personal reasons – or prefer short messages.
However, a noticeable change from someone’s normal pattern might indicate he’s withdrawing himself from the date.
[Related: “Guy Cancels Date Without Rescheduling”: Here’s What You Should Do]
2. He’s Vague About the Details
The date is drawing near, but he’s dodging any discussion of specifics.
While spontaneity can be exciting, a complete lack of planning might suggest he isn’t committing to the date.
For instance, he may keep things vague when it comes to setting a time, place, or activity.
People often avoid details when they’re unsure, reluctant or don’t want to commit to something.
If he’s usually the decisive type but suddenly can’t pin down the details for your date, it’s worth questioning. Are his vague plans a way to keep options open for an easy escape?
This isn’t to say that every instance of ambiguity means a date will be cancelled. After all, some people genuinely enjoy spontaneity.
However, if the vagueness is out of character or combined with other signs on this list, it could be a red flag.
3. He’s Not as Excited as Before
He was all fired up when he asked you out, but now his excitement has dwindled. If he was eager to see you but now seems indifferent, it might be a sign that he’s reconsidering the date.
Remember, excitement should be mutual in the build-up to a date. If he no longer shows the same level of interest, it’s normal to feel disappointed and confused.
It’s essential to keep your eyes open for this shift in his attitude and consider discussing it with him directly.
While everyone has moments of low energy or distraction, a sudden lack of enthusiasm about a date might be his way of signaling hesitance. It’s a subtle sign, but when combined with other indicators, it can suggest he’s thinking about cancelling the date.
[Read: How to Cancel a Date When You Already Said Yes (7 Tips)
4. He Starts Talking About His Busy Schedule
He’s suddenly reminding you of how packed his schedule is.
Sure, everyone has responsibilities and other commitments, but if he’s highlighting his busyness more frequently, it could be a warning sign. Is he subtly trying to prepare you for a cancellation?
Consistently bringing up how busy he is might be his way of creating a narrative that explains a potential cancellation. It’s a tactic that can make the cancellation seem less abrupt when it comes.
Listen to your gut when this kind of talk becomes more prevalent, as it might indicate an impending change of plans.
5. He’s Mentioning Other Potential Plans
While it’s perfectly fine to have other social activities, mentioning these potential plans close to your date could be a hint. Is he trying to lay the groundwork for a possible cancellation?
This could be anything from a sudden work meeting to a friend’s party. If these “other plans” start cropping up in conversation, it could mean he’s considering bailing on the date. It’s like he’s leaving breadcrumbs for you to follow to a cancellation.
Of course, sometimes plans do overlap, and it doesn’t necessarily mean he’s planning to cancel.
But, coupled with other signs, it could be an indication that the date isn’t his top priority. This is especially true if he keeps mentioning other plans without any attempt at rescheduling your date.
[Interesting: 8 Things A Third Date Means To A Man]
6. He’s Less Engaged in Conversation
A guy who’s usually attentive but has become disinterested or distracted could be a sign of a pending cancellation.
You may find him steering clear of personal topics or not engaging as deeply in your shared conversations.
When someone starts to pull away emotionally, it’s often because they’re contemplating a step back. Him being less engaged in your conversations could be his way of creating emotional distance before cancelling the date.
Sure, it’s normal for conversations to ebb and flow. After all, we all have off days, so this sign alone might not mean much. But when paired with other signs, it could point to him wanting to back out of the date.
7. His Body Language Feels Off
Something about his body language just doesn’t feel right.
This might be harder to pick up on if your interactions are mostly online, but if you see him in person and his body language seems off, it could be a clue.
For instance, you might notice that he’s less open and relaxed around you, or perhaps he avoids eye contact or appears closed off and uninterested when you’re conversing.
Body language is a powerful communicator, often revealing more than words. It can offer insight into what someone is feeling but not saying.
So, if you notice a shift in his body language, it might be that he’s wrestling with the idea of cancelling the date.
Remember, though, reading body language isn’t an exact science. People can act differently for various reasons, not necessarily related to your upcoming date.
[Related: First Date Went Well But No Second Date: Here’s What It Means]
8. He Avoids Future Talk
Usually, when we’re excited about a date, we start to fantasize or plan for future outings.
But if this guy is avoiding any talk about future plans or activities together, this could be a sign that he’s not fully invested in the upcoming date.
For instance, you playfully ask him if he’s looking forward to your date and he just brushes it off like he wished it wasn’t going to happen.
Instead of discussing anything related to the date, he’ll rather stick to normal casual discussions with you like you don’t have anything special coming up.
Could he be trying to prevent you from getting too attached because he’s thinking of cancelling?
Keep in mind, however, that everyone moves at their own pace. Some people might need more time to get comfortable with future planning. Still, a sudden avoidance of future talk, combined with other signs, could hint at a cancellation.
9. He’s Frequently Rescheduling
He’s already rescheduled the date a couple of times.
Everyone faces unexpected circumstances now and then, and rescheduling is sometimes necessary. But if he’s rescheduled multiple times without a good reason, it might be a sign that he’s not as committed to the date.
Frequent rescheduling can suggest a lack of respect for your time or that he’s not prioritizing the date.
Is he trying to postpone indefinitely? If this pattern is repetitive, it might be a sign that a full-on cancellation is on its way.
[Read: Who Should Initiate the Third Date?]
10. His Friends Don’t Know About You
This point isn’t absolute, but the idea behind it is that sharing a potential date with friends usually indicates a level of initial investment, excitement, and anticipation.
It’s really difficult to have a romantic interest you’re excited about without discussing him/her with your friends after nailing a date with them.
However, we can’t deny that not everyone will want to quickly share details about their date with their friends before the relationship becomes serious. Not to mention that sharing details about your date with your friends really depends on how close you are with them.
Not everyone has the kind of friends they can share everything with. So take this sign with a grain of salt. I think this point is more indicative on the positive side of things.
Meaning, if his friends already know about you before the date, that’s a strong indication that your date is very excited and is looking forward to meeting you.
Conclusion
Seeing one of these signs just once probably doesn’t mean much. However, when you start noticing a cluster of these signs constantly, then, you might need to have a difficult conversation with him date on how he feels about your upcoming date.
FAQs
He cancelled on me three times, what does this mean?
If he’s cancelled on you three times consecutively, it might be a sign of lack of interest or respect for your time.
Despite what his reasons may be, consistently cancelling signifies that he might not be prioritizing the date or your relationship. It’s crucial to communicate your feelings and concerns about the cancellations.
If he continues this pattern without good reason or apology, it may be time to reconsider if he is worth your time and energy.
[Read: “He Asked For A Second Date But Hasn’t Texted”: What Does This Mean?]
Cancelled date, but still texting
If he cancels a date but continues to text you regularly, it could mean several things. He may genuinely have had to cancel for reasons beyond his control but still wants to keep the lines of communication open.
Alternatively, it could also mean he’s unsure about taking things forward but doesn’t want to completely sever ties. The key to understanding his intentions is open communication.
Discuss your concerns about the cancelled date and his continued texting to gauge where he stands.
When a guy cancels a date without rescheduling
When a guy cancels a date without proposing an alternative, it could indicate a lack of interest or commitment to pursuing the relationship.
When someone is genuinely interested and has to cancel, they usually suggest another date to show their continued interest. If he doesn’t, it might be his indirect way of expressing that he doesn’t want to proceed with the date or relationship.
However, it’s always best to directly discuss what happened to avoid misunderstandings.
Why does he make plans then cancel?
If he consistently makes plans and then cancels, it might mean he’s ambivalent about the relationship.
This pattern could show a lack of decisiveness, respect for your time, or possibly an inability to manage his own schedule. It could also indicate that he’s dealing with personal issues that prevent him from committing to plans.
Communication is essential here. Express your feelings about this pattern to understand his perspective and decide whether it’s a situation you’re comfortable with.
- All photos from freepik.com